hello world!

once again coming to you from my phone because, duh, I’m not paying to have WiFi on a Carnival cruise ship. Mostly because it isn’t worth the money, and I want to enjoy being disconnected.

anywho, we are only about halfway through vacation! Currently docked in Juneau, Alaska, where this morning we literally took a helicopter ride through the glaciers and then had a guided tour through the snowcapped mountains. Yesterday we went dog sledding???? Life has been a dream these past few days, but more on that later!

because my internet time is so scarce, I want to tell my stories in depth and with time for lots of pictures. We coasted through the Tracy Arms Fjord during our second day of cruising, which is, as per described by the little Details tab on our itinerary, a narrow and deep inlet of sea usually formed by the sinking of a glaciel valley.” Pretty freaking neat, right? We didn’t dock anywhere, but I think I’m more than content floating through sunken glaciel valleys as I dip in the hot tub. My first thoughts were “Wow”. The thoughts that followed were something like “What the hell are we doing?” Because, my God, what the hell are we doing? What are we doing working, doing things other than creating or nurturing or loving? What are we doing exerting our energy being so worried about making others happy, about how we look in pictures or how people perceive us? And not just online. So often people blame social media for our societal downfall but how dense do you have to be to not realize this is a long time coming. Technology should be aiding us in so many ways, but we as humans fuck it up. The glaciel valleys were beautiful. But they were rocky. Rocky rocky rocky, my own cruise ship caused rippled and cracks in the frozen ocean water. Beautiful days, clear nights, and all I saw were birds. And that’s because they can fly away! The others critters hid. I don’t blame them. Sometimes I want to, too.

As I gazed up at the mountains, I felt the earth stare back at me. I felt her whispers in the wind; she showed me what she’s made of. We’re so insignificant. But in the best, most important ways. But not to ourselves, important to earth. To the bigger picture of things.

Growing up in catholic school, it always drove me crazy when the nuns or priests would tell me God was omnipotent. All knowing all seeing all everything. How? What does that mean? No one could give me a straight answer. I’m thankful for the lessons, but i don’t think they knew what it meant either. I called God “the Universe” for a while when I stopped trying to find an answer. I don’t think He minded. That’s important to note.

For once, I am beginning to understand the depth of being everything and nothing. Because in actuality, we don’t know shit. We don’t know anything. Except what we feel, what we surrender ourselves to. What we allow to flow within us, what we allow ourselves to flow with. In knowing nothing, there is such a beautiful simplicity. From complex understanding, peacefulness is born. We have to accept that the mountains and the oceans and the infinite skies are bigger than us. And then, just go with it. Cherish it. Take care of it. It’s ours! Why give it away?

Look at what God made for us.

we’ll be setting sail soon. My woman is napping on my chest as I write and I feel her snores in beat with my heart…how could I think about anything else, except for how to keep this feeling in a jar and carry it in my pocket? Good thing my heart comes everywhere with me.

The next stops are Ketchikan and Victoria! I can’t wait to have more time to share this amazing experience with everyone (or no one! How peaceful to not really care).

au revoir!